January 22, 2011


22 JANUARY 2011

Went for a midnight movie, watched this Khurafat movie. It was so freaking scary, the most scary movie ever with the unpredictable scene where the ghost suddenly appear in the picture. The main actor and actress is Shamsul yusof and Lyana Jasmay. It was a 7 rate star movie, not bad for Malay people in making first horror movie. It actually a moral value movie about Malay Cultural life, not all but some. So basically leave your homework, assignment and work, spend just one day to watch this movie. Support our film industry :)

Actually I'm here not to talk about the movie but I'm here to talk about my past. To my lovely love, I know you'll hate me if I talk about my past or your past but some say, past will never fade no matter how much time we take to forget about it. There will be some of the thing we do daily make us think about it because it used to happened before and you consider it as your biggest nightmare and when the same thing happened to you, you gonna consider it as a nightmare. So basically, my biggest fear arrived today, when I was sitting having my dinner. Suddenly just one moment I saw this glimpse, all coming back to me, the memory, the time, it was yucks! Painful! It's like thousand knife stab you from behind and that is how worse my biggest fear, my heart beat so fast and around seem like not moving at all. I feel sad at the same time, I feel disappointed, I feel hopeless because I know I can't change it, not even many years. It hurts, hurts so badly. No matter how hard I keep on telling my self this is life but to me life is very unfair.

I still remember, when I was a little baby girl, I keep on dreaming about my wedding, how it gonna look like. Dreaming about my husband, how he gonna look like. Every single things I already picture it in my mind and each time, i keep on redesign my picture as time passes by. It sucks! Until just one day I realize that life is not like what we hope it can be, love can't be beautiful as what we think it will be, I realize that life is not perfection, it's actually imperfection. Imperfection that we have to make it perfect by finding the vice versa of our self, the understanding we have for each other and I realize how hard it will be. Talking and complaining not gonna make any different in this field, move and action is actually what we need and I believe what some people say about love, falling in love is easy but to fall for a true love is not that easy and I believe in some people opinion that not all people we love can actually feel us true, true love. It hurts!

God! Please give me strength so that I can move on

p/s: don't expect things happened like what you plan
p/s: accept it with your heart if that what you choose
p/s: I'm happy with what I have today

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